You brought the sun back! Thank you, darling. I was just lounging in my orangerie in my bikini writing this, (I’ve just sent you a picture) when I thought it’s such a lovely day, I might eat out.
But then I thought, has your Lord Freud rumbled me? Oh, he’s really has got his finger on the pulse hasn’t he, cottoning on to the fact that the only reason why the number of people going to food banks has gone up is because there are just more available these days and let’s face it, it’s free food.
Me and my ‘disabled’ friends have mapped out all the food banks in the area and we’ve been patronising them whenever we get a girls’ nights out. I must say, the Brixton one gave superb service. They gave me the most incredible baked beans in tomato sauce I think I’ve ever had. Of course, the ambience was not as good as the one at St Paul’s where me and my friends were treated to an amazing array of crusty loaf sandwiches – cucumber, egg and cress, spam etc. I think it’s hardly surprising that food bank use sky-rocketed, (with demand from households going from 30,000 the year before the election to 350,000 last year) – with charities suggesting that 650 more were needed to match demand – because the experience is always so great; lots of like-minded people, all sharing the same goal, (of trying to get free food), being helped by kind-hearted people in the spirit of solidarity and support. What’s not to like? I’ll tell you something, I’m never going to Nando’s again. Food banks are the way to go. I even got some Pop Tarts last time!
Just remember not to leave a tip. For some reason, they get a bit touchy when you do that.