24th May 2013
My Pink Macaroon,
It seems every day people are fighting back against IDS and his welfare reforms. Just yesterday, I read that two people have won legal claims to say the Work Capability Assessments discriminate unfairly against the mentally ill. I think it might be time to do your magic again and use your retrospective legislation thingy to make it okay to take advantage of the poor buggers like you did with the legal challenge on workfare.
Unfortunately, with about a third of claimants on ESA appeals suffering from mental illness this might have dire consequences on your clampdown of the workshy fakers and that simply can’t be allowed to happen. The jobless lifestyle has been so ingrained on some members of society that they would rather die than have to work. And it’s become an epidemic. About 32 people a week, according to some estimates, die after failing the WCA. And some of these activists who can’t rely on their weak hearts to make a statement have to rely on other means, like stepping out in front of fast-moving traffic.
Perhaps you heard about Stephanie Bottrill. 53. Disabled. It would have been fine had she just gone away quietly to die, but no, she has to blame the Bedroom Tax. Ludicrous if you ask me. They offered her a smaller property (albeit miles and miles from friends and family and thirty minutes walk away from the nearest bus stop) but she just refused to take it. Personally, I think she died just to spite you. Though, on the upside, now there’s a vacant property that can be taken off social housing and sold to the highest bidder. Yay.
I don’t know what the fuss is all about, to be honest. I don’t understand how some people would rather be dead than be homeless. If enough people thought like that, then you can expect suicide on a national scale when Universal Credit gets fully implemented. Under the new system, as you know, housing payments stop going directly to the landlords. In one of the places the trial was being run, rent arrears went up 700%. In fact, in every council where it was trialled, rent arrears soared. Of course, on seeing the results of the trials, landlords all across the country are already sending eviction notices to people on benefits to pre-empt Universal Credit, which inevitably will mean a return to the good old days of Thatcherism; where the poor knew their place – ordinarily a piss-stained doorway in the street. Well, as long as they’re not claiming housing benefit for that doorway, I can’t see what the problem is.
Kiss that bald-headed genius for me and keep up the good work, my lovely lovely man.