3rd April 2013
My Elite Love,
How super-fun! The British Broadcasting Conservatives did a huge survey, and apparently there are now seven different classes of people in the UK. No longer are we split into upper, middle and working classes; we are now the elite, the established middle class, technical middle class, new affluent workers, traditional working class, emergent service workers or precariat/precarious proletariat. (Personally, I would have added an eighth class: Iain Duncan Smith.)
They even have a little calculator on there so that people can find out whether they are classy or not. I particularly love the fact that they have named the lower classes “precariat” – it is far nicer than “pleb” and will hopefully mean that the scum stop whinging at last. (I personally wouldn’t be offended by being called a “precariat”. It does sound rather posh and cool, after all, and with luck the precariat won’t remember what it means and will think it’s something to do with procurement, or something, whatever that means.)
That’s by the by, anyway, as I did in fact take the class test and was pleasantly surprised to find out that I am part of the established middle class. Quite honestly I was expecting to find out that I am a pleb, sorry, precarious proletariat, and I do still have my suspicions – I think the fact that I listen to jazz and classical music did it, in truth – but the fact that the Beeb think I am a well classy bird has gladdened the old ticker no end.
What category did you fall into, darling? Did the fact that you’re a big Take That fan lower your status somewhat? Either way, I am convinced that we are a close match and can finally be together. Phone me. ❤