26th November 2012
I had a visit from a friend today who had asked me for some help to write a letter to her MP and her local council. You see, my friend has been working since she was 16 years of age and believes in working hard and living carefully. Her daughter is six years of age, and they live in a privately rented home with a small amount of assistance from housing benefit. Now, since her benefit has been capped and her landlord has announced that he is going to be raising the rent by over £100 in August 2013 to over £1,000, she is deeply worried about how she is going to sustain her rent, childcare expenses and travel costs to and from work.
Of course, Dave, I absolutely refused to help her write a critical letter. I tried my very best to explain to her about the “deficit” and about how we are all having to make sacrifices but it fell on deaf ears. The minute that she mentioned that she doesn’t vote Conservative and is deeply concerned about all of the benefit reforms that your government are making I couldn’t withhold my contempt for her “something for nothing” attitude any longer. I promptly threw her down the stairs, karate chopped the bitch and ordered her to get out of my house. She tried to apologise and said she had seen the error of her ways, but by that point I simply could not contain the indignance and rage that had been bubbling in my soul any longer, and, Matrix-style, beat her to within an inch of her life.
I never liked her anyway.
I love you, Dave.