14th November 2012

Good day Dave!

I was so heartened to read today of plans to implement grants next year for people starting up childcare businesses.  It really will help so many new mothers to get back into work as quickly as possible after giving birth which is exactly what the country needs right now.  I personally stayed home with my own children, since this tied in conveniently with my being a long-term illness sufferer, but I do so wish I had been able to pay someone else to raise them for me.  Whilst both of my children are thriving both academically and socially, I am sure that had they been in the care of someone else for 8-10 hours per day that they would both by now have completed their GCSEs and would be out there, aged 6 and 8, contributing to our great society.  Also, I don’t know about you, but I have never heard of a childminder or childcare professional with any complaints about their rights or earning abilities.  It really is an entrepreneurial business filled with vast profits and happy children.

In addition, (and I am sure this thought hasn’t escaped you) the faster we can get these mothers back to work, the faster that their children will be forced onto the bottle.  Let me tell you, breastfeeding is a long and protracted nightmare which means you’re held prisoner to your child for the duration that you breastfeed, and in my opinion women should be warned against it at all costs.  Of course, unless women choose the awkward and painful route of expressing for their young they will have no other option but to transfer to bottle milk, which will also increase profits for a handful of our large pharmaceutical companies – an added bonus!  How great it will be to stick it to those potty feminists who claim that “breast is best”.  What a load of old tosh.

I wonder if I should consider starting up my own nursery.  I am a woman, after all, and let’s face it; it’s what we’re best at.  As my health is poor, I could hire several school leavers to care for other people’s children at £6 an hour, and make a huge profit.  Perhaps I could even take in a few workfare employees, therefore cutting my staff costs entirely.  Gosh, what a good idea.

Love and gratitude,

Katy Anchant

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